Bourdain’s Restaurant No-Nos: 14 Dishes To Dodge!

Certain menu items should be approached with caution, according to the late Anthony Bourdain’s insights, which continue to resonate with food enthusiasts seeking authentic and high-quality dining experiences. From questionable seafood choices on Mondays to perpetually suspect specials, Bourdain’s culinary wisdom offers a guide to navigating restaurant menus with discernment.

Anthony Bourdain, the celebrated chef, author, and television personality, left behind a legacy of culinary exploration and a healthy dose of skepticism when it came to restaurant practices. His no-nonsense approach to dining continues to influence food lovers, urging them to think critically about their choices. Bourdain, in his various writings and shows, highlighted several dishes and practices that should raise red flags for diners. These warnings, gleaned from years in the restaurant industry, offer a fascinating glimpse behind the kitchen doors and provide valuable advice for anyone looking to avoid a disappointing meal. The points are intended to help diners make more informed decisions and avoid dishes that may not be fresh, well-prepared, or honestly represented.

Dishes to Dodge: A Bourdain-Inspired Guide

Bourdain’s guidance boils down to a few key principles: question freshness, be wary of cost-cutting measures, and understand the limitations of a restaurant kitchen. Applying these principles, here are fourteen specific dishes or dining practices that Bourdain advised avoiding:

1. Fish on Mondays: One of Bourdain’s most famous pieces of advice was to avoid ordering fish on Mondays. “I wouldn’t order fish on Monday,” Bourdain stated plainly in his book Kitchen Confidential. The reasoning is simple: most restaurants receive their fresh fish deliveries on Thursday or Friday. By Monday, that fish is likely several days old, and potentially not at its peak freshness. While this might not be a universal rule, particularly for restaurants that specialize in seafood or have reliable daily deliveries, it’s a useful guideline to keep in mind. The risk of ordering older fish is higher on Mondays than later in the week. This point underscores Bourdain’s emphasis on freshness as a critical factor in enjoying a good meal. Restaurants that prioritize quality will often adjust their menus based on the availability of fresh ingredients. Diners who are particularly concerned about freshness can inquire about the restaurant’s delivery schedule.

2. Brunch Buffet: The allure of an all-you-can-eat brunch buffet can be strong, but Bourdain cautioned against it. Buffets, in general, can be breeding grounds for food safety issues if not managed properly. Food may sit out for extended periods, temperatures may not be adequately maintained, and cross-contamination is a risk. Furthermore, the quality of the ingredients used in buffet items is often lower than what you’d find in a la carte dishes. “How long has it been sitting there? How old are those scrambled eggs?” Bourdain might have asked. While some establishments maintain high standards for their buffets, it’s generally safer to order individual brunch items prepared fresh to order. Consider the volume of people served and whether the restaurant can reasonably ensure freshness and safety for every dish.

3. “Special” Dishes: The term “special” can be misleading. While some specials genuinely showcase a chef’s creativity and feature seasonal ingredients, others are simply a way to move older or less desirable ingredients. Bourdain warned that specials are often “the stuff they’re trying to get rid of.” Restaurants may use specials to clear out ingredients nearing their expiration date or to utilize cuts of meat that are less popular. A discerning diner should inquire about the ingredients and preparation of the special before ordering. Ask specific questions such as: “What makes this dish special?” and “Where did the ingredients come from?” A transparent server should be able to provide clear and informative answers.

4. Well-Done Steak: Ordering a steak well-done was, for Bourdain, a culinary sin. He argued that it not only ruins the flavor and texture of the meat but also insults the chef. Chefs often take pride in their ability to cook a steak to the perfect temperature, and a well-done order suggests a lack of trust in their expertise. Furthermore, lower-quality cuts of meat are often cooked well-done to mask their imperfections. Bourdain wasn’t alone in his disdain for well-done steak; many chefs share the opinion that it’s a waste of good meat. While personal preference is important, understanding the chef’s perspective can lead to a more enjoyable dining experience.

5. Anything with Hollandaise Sauce: Bourdain advised caution when ordering dishes with hollandaise sauce, particularly if the restaurant isn’t known for its brunch or breakfast service. Hollandaise sauce is notoriously difficult to make and requires careful temperature control to prevent curdling or bacterial growth. If the sauce isn’t made fresh daily, it can quickly become a breeding ground for bacteria. “Hollandaise must be made fresh, and is a favorite breeding ground for bacteria,” Bourdain cautioned. Unless you’re in a restaurant that specializes in breakfast or brunch, it’s best to avoid this potentially risky sauce.

6. Swordfish: Swordfish, according to Bourdain, is often overfished and of questionable quality. He described it as “the garbage fish of the sea” in Kitchen Confidential, suggesting that much of the swordfish available is old, tough, and not particularly flavorful. Furthermore, the environmental impact of swordfish fishing is a concern. Diners who are environmentally conscious or concerned about quality may want to consider alternative seafood options. Look for sustainably sourced seafood options and ask your server about the origin of the fish.

7. Chicken Fingers/Nuggets (for Adults): Ordering chicken fingers or nuggets as an adult, in Bourdain’s view, suggests a lack of culinary adventure and a willingness to settle for low-quality food. He saw it as a sign that the diner wasn’t willing to explore the menu or try something new. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with enjoying comfort food, Bourdain encouraged diners to be more adventurous and to try dishes that showcase the chef’s skill and creativity. This advice is more about encouraging culinary exploration than dictating what people should eat.

8. Anything the Waiter Tries to Upsell Aggressively: When a waiter is overly insistent on pushing a particular dish or item, it should raise suspicion. It often means the restaurant is trying to get rid of something that isn’t selling well or is about to expire. Genuine recommendations should come across as helpful and informative, not pushy or desperate. Pay attention to the waiter’s demeanor and the way they describe the dish. If they seem overly eager to make a sale, it’s best to proceed with caution.

9. Mussels (Served in a Restaurant on a Sunday): If a restaurant serves mussels on a Sunday, it could indicate that they are leftover from Friday, when seafood deliveries usually happen. Mussels are best when fresh, and their quality degrades quickly. Bourdain would likely advise checking with the restaurant about when they received the mussels, and if they are not fresh, to avoid ordering them.

10. Overly Complicated Menu Items: Dishes with long descriptions and numerous ingredients might be trying to compensate for something lacking in the core components. A simple, well-executed dish often speaks volumes about the quality of ingredients and the skill of the chef. Restaurants that rely on overly complicated presentations or sauces may be trying to mask the use of lower-quality ingredients.

11. Anything with Truffle Oil: Truffle oil rarely contains real truffles, and often uses synthetic flavorings to mimic the taste. Bourdain regarded it as an overused and often misused ingredient, adding that it rarely enhances a dish and often detracts from it. The strong, artificial flavor can overpower other, more delicate flavors.

12. Cheap Sushi: Low-priced sushi is a red flag, as quality sushi requires fresh, high-grade fish. Cutting corners on ingredients can lead to food safety issues and a disappointing dining experience. Look for reputable sushi restaurants with experienced chefs and a commitment to using fresh, high-quality ingredients.

13. Oysters on Days Without an “R” in the Month: Although not a hard and fast rule, Bourdain might caution against ordering oysters in months without an “R” (May, June, July, August) due to potential risks of bacterial contamination in warmer months. This is an older guideline, and modern refrigeration has made it less of a concern, but the principle of being mindful of freshness still applies.

14. “Crispy” Anything (If it’s Not Actually Crispy): If a dish is described as “crispy,” but arrives at the table soggy or limp, it’s a sign that it wasn’t prepared properly. This could indicate that the food wasn’t freshly made or that the kitchen is cutting corners. A properly executed crispy dish should have a satisfying crunch and a pleasing texture.

Bourdain’s advice isn’t about being a difficult customer; it’s about being an informed and discerning diner. By understanding the potential pitfalls of restaurant practices, diners can make better choices and increase their chances of having a truly enjoyable and authentic culinary experience. He encouraged people to be curious, to ask questions, and to trust their instincts.

Beyond the Plate: Underlying Principles

While the above list provides specific examples, Bourdain’s philosophy extended beyond individual dishes. He emphasized the importance of supporting restaurants that prioritize quality ingredients, treat their staff well, and take pride in their craft. He admired chefs who were passionate about their work and committed to providing an honest and authentic dining experience.

Bourdain also encouraged diners to be adventurous and to try new things. He believed that food was a way to connect with different cultures and to learn about the world. He urged people to step outside their comfort zones and to embrace the unexpected.

He frequently spoke about the importance of kitchen culture and how it affected the quality of the food. A well-run kitchen with happy and respected staff is more likely to produce excellent food. Conversely, a kitchen with a toxic or stressful environment can lead to inconsistent and poorly prepared dishes.

Ultimately, Bourdain’s advice was about empowering diners to make informed decisions and to demand better from the restaurant industry. He believed that by being more discerning consumers, people could help to raise the standards of food quality and service.

Modern Relevance of Bourdain’s Advice

Even though Bourdain passed away in 2018, his advice remains remarkably relevant in today’s restaurant landscape. The principles of freshness, transparency, and culinary integrity are timeless. In an era of social media-driven dining and ever-increasing competition, Bourdain’s wisdom serves as a valuable reminder to focus on the fundamentals of good food and honest service.

Consumers are increasingly aware of food sourcing, ethical practices, and the environmental impact of their choices. Bourdain’s emphasis on these issues resonates strongly with today’s diners, who are looking for restaurants that align with their values.

Furthermore, the rise of online reviews and social media has made it easier for diners to share their experiences, both good and bad. This increased transparency puts pressure on restaurants to maintain high standards of quality and service. Bourdain’s advice encourages diners to be active participants in this process, using their voices to support restaurants that are doing things right and to call out those that are cutting corners.

The gig economy and staffing shortages in the restaurant industry also make Bourdain’s advice relevant. As restaurants struggle to find and retain qualified staff, there may be a temptation to compromise on quality or to take shortcuts in the kitchen. Diners who are aware of these challenges can be more discerning in their choices and support restaurants that are committed to maintaining high standards, even in difficult circumstances.

The Importance of Context

It’s important to note that Bourdain’s advice should be taken in context. He was often speaking from his own experiences in high-end restaurants, and his perspective may not always apply to every dining situation. A casual diner at a local diner, for example, may have different expectations than someone dining at a Michelin-starred restaurant.

Furthermore, the restaurant industry has evolved since Bourdain first shared his insights. New technologies and practices have emerged that can improve food safety and quality. However, the underlying principles of freshness, transparency, and culinary integrity remain as important as ever.

Conclusion

Anthony Bourdain’s culinary wisdom continues to offer valuable guidance for navigating the complexities of the restaurant world. By being mindful of the dishes and practices he cautioned against, diners can make more informed choices and increase their chances of enjoying a truly exceptional meal. His legacy encourages a more discerning and engaged approach to dining, promoting quality, integrity, and a deeper appreciation for the art of cooking. Bourdain’s enduring influence reminds us to be curious, to ask questions, and to demand the best from the culinary experiences we seek. By remembering his lessons, we can become more informed consumers and contribute to a dining culture that values authenticity and excellence. Bourdain’s legacy extends beyond just food; it’s about connecting with cultures and respecting culinary traditions.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

1. Why did Anthony Bourdain advise against ordering fish on Mondays?

   Bourdain advised against it because most restaurants receive their fresh fish deliveries earlier in the week, typically Thursday or Friday. By Monday, the fish is likely several days old and may not be as fresh. While not a universal rule, it’s a useful guideline for avoiding potentially less-than-fresh seafood. “I wouldn’t order fish on Monday,” he stated in Kitchen Confidential, emphasizing the importance of freshness in seafood.

2. What was Bourdain’s concern with brunch buffets?

   Bourdain was wary of brunch buffets due to potential food safety issues. He highlighted that food may sit out for extended periods, temperatures may not be adequately maintained, and there is a risk of cross-contamination. Also, the quality of ingredients used in buffet items is often lower than in a la carte dishes. He implied concerns about how long the food has been sitting there, questioning the freshness and safety of the items.

3. Why did Bourdain suggest being cautious about “special” dishes on the menu?

   Bourdain cautioned against specials because they can sometimes be a way for restaurants to use up ingredients that are nearing their expiration date or less desirable cuts of meat. While some specials showcase a chef’s creativity, others might be a way to clear out older items. He warned that specials are often “the stuff they’re trying to get rid of,” advising diners to inquire about the ingredients and preparation methods.

4. What was Bourdain’s opinion on ordering steak well-done?

   Bourdain considered ordering a steak well-done a culinary sin. He believed it ruined the flavor and texture of the meat and insulted the chef, who takes pride in cooking a steak to the perfect temperature. Additionally, lower-quality cuts of meat are often cooked well-done to mask imperfections.

5. Why did Bourdain advise against dishes with hollandaise sauce?

   Bourdain advised caution because hollandaise sauce is difficult to make and requires careful temperature control to prevent curdling or bacterial growth. If not made fresh daily, it can quickly become a breeding ground for bacteria. He noted, “Hollandaise must be made fresh, and is a favorite breeding ground for bacteria,” suggesting avoiding it unless in a restaurant known for its breakfast or brunch service.

6. What were Bourdain’s thoughts on Swordfish as a menu option?

   Bourdain viewed Swordfish as often overfished and of questionable quality. He went so far as to describe it as “the garbage fish of the sea” in Kitchen Confidential, implying that much of the swordfish available is old, tough, and lacks flavor. He also highlighted concerns about the environmental impact of swordfish fishing.

7. What was wrong with ordering chicken fingers or nuggets if you are an adult diner?

   Bourdain wasn’t suggesting there was anything necessarily wrong with it. Instead, he thought that ordering chicken fingers or nuggets as an adult showed a lack of culinary exploration. He saw it as a sign that the diner was not willing to step out of their comfort zone and try something new or that showcased the chef’s abilities.

8. If a server is aggressively upselling, what should you take into consideration?

   If a server is pushing a particular item too enthusiastically, it should make a diner suspicious. This often means the restaurant is trying to get rid of something that isn’t selling well or is nearing its expiration date. A genuine recommendation comes across as helpful and informative, not pushy.

9. Why did Bourdain suggest not ordering mussels served in a restaurant on a Sunday?

   Bourdain was likely suggesting not ordering mussels on a Sunday because, in most cases, they would be leftovers from seafood deliveries usually happening on Fridays. Mussels are best when fresh, and their quality degrades quickly.

10. What should you infer from a complicated menu item?

    Dishes with long descriptions and numerous ingredients might be trying to compensate for something lacking in the core components. A simple, well-executed dish often speaks volumes about the quality of ingredients and the skill of the chef.

11. Why did Bourdain dislike Truffle Oil?

    Truffle oil rarely contains real truffles, and often uses synthetic flavorings to mimic the taste. Bourdain regarded it as an overused and often misused ingredient, adding that it rarely enhances a dish and often detracts from it with its strong, artificial flavor.

12. What is so bad about cheap sushi?

    Low-priced sushi is a red flag, as quality sushi requires fresh, high-grade fish. Cutting corners on ingredients can lead to food safety issues and a disappointing dining experience.

13. What did Bourdain think about the old rule of thumb related to eating Oysters?

    Although not a hard and fast rule, Bourdain might caution against ordering oysters in months without an “R” (May, June, July, August) due to potential risks of bacterial contamination in warmer months. This is an older guideline, and modern refrigeration has made it less of a concern, but the principle of being mindful of freshness still applies.

14. What should you do if an item comes out “crispy” and it is not actually crispy?

    If a dish is described as “crispy,” but arrives at the table soggy or limp, it’s a sign that it wasn’t prepared properly. This could indicate that the food wasn’t freshly made or that the kitchen is cutting corners.

Additional Considerations for Modern Diners

Beyond Bourdain’s specific recommendations, there are several other factors that modern diners should consider when choosing a restaurant:

• Sustainability: Look for restaurants that are committed to sustainable practices, such as using locally sourced ingredients, reducing food waste, and minimizing their environmental impact.
• Ethical Labor Practices: Support restaurants that treat their staff fairly and provide a living wage. Research the restaurant’s policies on wages, benefits, and working conditions.
• Allergies and Dietary Restrictions: Communicate any allergies or dietary restrictions clearly to the server. Choose restaurants that are accommodating and knowledgeable about food sensitivities.
• Transparency: Look for restaurants that are transparent about their sourcing and preparation methods. Don’t be afraid to ask questions about the ingredients, cooking techniques, and origins of the food.
• Reviews and Ratings: Check online reviews and ratings from other diners, but take them with a grain of salt. Consider the source of the reviews and look for consistent patterns of feedback.

The Evolution of Dining Culture

The restaurant industry has undergone significant changes since Bourdain first shared his insights. The rise of food blogs, social media, and celebrity chefs has transformed the way people think about food and dining.

Consumers are more informed and engaged than ever before. They are actively seeking out unique and authentic culinary experiences. They are also more demanding and have higher expectations for quality and service.

Restaurants are responding to these changes by becoming more creative, innovative, and customer-focused. They are using technology to enhance the dining experience, experimenting with new flavors and ingredients, and embracing sustainable practices.

However, the fundamental principles of good food and honest service remain as important as ever. Diners should continue to be discerning and to demand the best from the restaurants they patronize.

Bourdain’s Enduring Legacy

Anthony Bourdain’s legacy extends far beyond the restaurant world. He was a storyteller, a cultural explorer, and a champion of the underdog. He used food as a vehicle to connect with people from all walks of life and to share their stories with the world.

He inspired countless people to travel, to try new things, and to be more open-minded. He challenged conventional wisdom and encouraged people to think critically about the world around them.

Bourdain’s voice is sorely missed, but his legacy lives on through his books, television shows, and the countless people he inspired. His wisdom continues to guide diners in their quest for authentic and memorable culinary experiences. He reminded us that food is not just about sustenance; it’s about culture, connection, and the shared human experience.